Christmas Eve
Today is Christmas Eve and also my dearest father’s birthday! When I was busy with celebrating Christmas in Life Group and church, I totally forgot today is my father’s birthday. How shame I am! This afternoon my sister sent a message to me from China, which said Merry Christmas to me and also told me about today is Daddy’s birthday! I suddenly felt so guilty!
Last week, I sent a Christmas card back to China for my dearest families. One reason is I want to share Jesus’s love with them and make them feel the love from God. The other reason is I realised my parents’ relationship is still not good! But until last Saturday, the card still didn’t arrive! I cried out to God and asked Him to help me to let the card arrive safely and deliver the message that I want to share with my dearest familes!
Praise God that my Mum told me today that the card arrived yesterday! I am so excited that God answered my prayer and let the Christmas card arrive before Christmas day!But when I called my Mum, she didn’t feel happy to celebrate Daddy’s birthday tonight, even didn’t have any idea about Christmas eve or Christmas! How sad it is! When I felt joyful in Life Group’s x-mas party or church “unforgettable Christmas”, I always thought if my families could feel what I feel, how wonderful it is! I really wanna give all I can give to my families!
I remember there was a question that asked during x-mas party by Ray: what are you going to give for your precious friends or families as a Christmas gift? In my heart, I know I can give my life to my families or my precious friend if necessary! I truely love them so much! But now even celebrating my dearest Daddy’s birthday with my families, I could not make it! I really felt guilty when I heard the crying sound of my Mum from the other phone side! My heart is really really sad!!
I questioned God what kind of the situation that need to face like this? I wanna go home, back to China and share the gospel with my own families? How come I am here to save other people’s lives, how about my families? Who has the mercy on them? Who can share the gospel with them? Who can really take care of them? I wanna solve the problem between Mum and Dad, give them more love which is from you!! But what I am doing now? Caring about others’ lives everyday and ignoring my own loving families?
There is only one answer in my heart! I need you do more for my kingdom! I need you! Obey my calling! Obey! You can do more than what you can imagine! Be strong!!
God, Jesus! I know! I know I need to be strong in You! I know your calling is clearer day by day! Except obedience, I don’t have any way out! But Lord, on the Christmas Eve, can I please have one prayer request: I pray that my Daddy will have a great birthday tonight! my parents’ relationship will get better after tonight! Please open the door for my families to let them know You more after tonight!
Lord, nothing is impossible for You! It is so great that You came to the earth 2000 years before and showed Your love to all of us! I commit myself and my whole families to Your mighty hands tonight, all of us need Your great love and mercy!! I pray in Jesus name, Amen!!
